Waking up each day as a medical professional is becoming more and more emotional. Waking up to the reality of what lies ahead a few hours later (yes, I said a few….I wake up early). Each morning as I attempt to pull myself out of bed my body aches a little bit more; these individuals in the intensive care unit are what we consider “dead weight;” meaning, they are paralyzed and/or in a coma so their body cannot help us turn, lift, roll, or anything. As many of you know one of the most common comorbidities is obesity so you add 250+ pounds and turning it becomes a strain.
The hot showers twice a day feel great, play a little music, cry a little, pray a whole lot, and thank God each day for my safety! One of the most important pieces of my uniform are my compression stockings! These are a saving grace 🙌 (most days)! I chose not to wear them one day and my legs hurt so bad I was in tears…compression socks are a nurses best friend (send some to Texas)!
Compressions though…this is a whole different story! I can’t begin to tell you how difficult it is to perform both physically and emotionally; each time a patient arrests it gets more and more difficult to go through the motions, yet we want so badly for them to pull though! The sad part is, the difficult part yet the REALITY is that they will not make it and if they do, they will not be the same.
The difficult part of this deployment is we know what we are coming into; as disaster response nurses 95% of us have been through this either in New York, Florida, and or Texas round one. The nurses here in rural hospitals have never seen the amount of patients that they are seeing, adding to the difficulty both for the core staff, the relief staff, and the rural community at large.
This is a short post, there are more that will be coming later today in the weeks ahead that I am working on. I appreciate all of your prayers, support, care packages, and words of encouragement. Being in school full-time, working more than full-time, being away from my kids to give them the best life they deserve is DIFFICULT and gut wrenching….oh and did I mention very lonely. Thank you for those who have sent cards! If you are wanting my address, let me know and I am happy to share!